True Neutral

Has considered both sides and would like to go home.

• Geralt of Rivia
  The Witcher

  Insists he doesn't take sides, right before taking a side.

• Garfield
  Garfield

  Morally committed to lasagna and nothing else.

• The Dude
  The Big Lebowski

  Abides. Has abided through a kidnapping, a severed toe and a ruined rug.

• Squidward
  SpongeBob SquarePants

  Wants to be left alone with his clarinet. Has never once been.

• Doctor Manhattan
  Watchmen

  Sees all of time at once and still can't be bothered.

• Treebeard
  The Lord of the Rings

  Took three days to say hello. Took one afternoon to flatten Isengard.

• Snorlax
  Pokémon

  Blocks the road. Has been blocking the road since 1996.

• Daria Morgendorffer
  Daria

  Has opinions about everything and energy for none of it.

• Eeyore
  Winnie-the-Pooh

  Lost his tail. Expected to. Would have been suspicious otherwise.

• Shrek
  Shrek

  Wants his swamp back. Everything else is a side quest he resents.

• Ron Swanson
  Parks and Recreation

  Works for the government in order to stop it. Has a pyramid of greatness.

• Saitama
  One-Punch Man

  A hero for fun. Finds the fun has mostly left.

• Marvin the Paranoid Android
  The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

  A brain the size of a planet, used entirely for complaining.